I guess I have some explaining to do - I've exceed in one thing this week and that is the time in which change comes back into your life, you'll gain the most knowledge in the world- like I did this week.

Change, completely inevitable.

I was incrediably disappointed this week, but last night I felt like I was at the time of my life -
I went to Trevor's first Shield game. We talked. Awkwardly
I was proud of him, even though I didn't want to be there at first, I'm glad I went.
That boy, he's astonishing.
Is it so bad, loving something that once felt so right?

In this case it is.
Churchward said "This second you'll see him, all those feelings will come back." They did alight.
I'm breathless.
Captivated.
Absolutely in love with a boy who doesn't care.

In a way, he had to care a bit right?
Like, if he invited me to go to his game... he must of care a little?
right?
You see, I've never understood that boy.

Right now, I really shouldn't get involved in love after seeing my parent's relationship fall apart. It's scary. Stupid. Something beyond my maturity.
I think my mom expects me to be okay with it, I really don't think she understand how much it does hurt me; that I leave my classroom and cry at least twice a day.
That I can barely crack a smile in the morning.
That I cry, everynight before I go to sleep.
She doesn't know, 'cause I don't tell her.
I don't want her to regret the things that she can't control.

Guess I'm just sparing her the trouble.

- aLways wOndering. sara cous.